Tag: writing

Uncategorized

The Joy Deficit

by Marla GottschalkLeave a Comment on The Joy Deficit

I would consider myself to be a happy person. Possibly a bit too optimistic about people & situations, which can pose an occasional problem. But, I’m also largely driven by simple things, which might work in my favor. Yet, I will openly admit that I could be happier and possibly feel more satisfied with my life. Most of us have room for improvement, so to speak — and finding more joy would be beneficial. I’m not certain of the severity of my own joy deficit, but it is likely present. Addressing that deficit seems vital. For all of us.

So what should be the focus if we set out to increase the amount of joy in our lives?

Research on life satisfaction appears to hinge on three major constructs, achievement (recognition & a sense of accomplishment), meaningfulness (a sense of purpose regarding our actions) and joy. While the two former constructs feel easier to define and capture — the latter feels much more esoteric and quite personal.

When considering the notion of joy, I cannot help but turn to the poets and philosophers for clues. They not only seem to contemplate and understand what brings joy, they have graced us with the added bonus of writing about it. Love and nature seem to be enduring topics, but I suppose this is highly specific to an individual. Personally, I find laughter to be the most accessible “joyful” activity, as life can come with more than a decent amount of stress and emotional burden.

I think we pass over some “joy rich” activities as either frivolous or unimportant (I love rearranging the furniture) — but they are not.

Everyone should reflect on the elements that supply them with joy, as we spend too far little time paying attention to this.

I’ll start with 5 of my joy-inducing elements. You’re next. Leave your list in comments.

  1. Walking through a summer garden.
  2. Laughing with one of my children, over something silly.
  3. Standing on a beach, appreciating the vastness of Lake Michigan.
  4. Seeing one my my paintings happily installed in a collector’s home.
  5. Rearranging the vignette on my black marble coffee table.

What brings you joy?

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychology Practitioner who focuses on bringing core stability to our work lives. She is a charter member of the LinkedIn Top Voice Program. Her thoughts on work & life have appeared in various outlets including the Harvard Business Review, The World Economic Forum & the BBC.

Uncategorized

The Ugly Truth About Goals, The Gap & Lowering Expectations

by Marla GottschalkLeave a Comment on The Ugly Truth About Goals, The Gap & Lowering Expectations

It can suck to be a beginner at just about anything. It’s not only that you are not yet great at this thing that you value. There is the recognition of the gap — the presence of mind to know what is good — and that you are clearly not there. This can force an entire “judgment cascade”, concerning not only your current status, but how far you have to go and how quickly you should improve.

Most of us are not great at being beginners, and it seems we lose that gift over time. When we attend college, none of us holds the expectation that after our first semester as a freshman, we will be ready to fully function in our field of choice (if we’ve managed to identify that field). We are patient in that sense, and willing to put in the endless hours of sitting in class, reading textbooks and listening to professors share their expertise. Moreover, we are not unhappy about making that investment. Because we patently accept that all of this takes time. Our goals are aligned with the process.

But we lose this patience as time goes on. We barely tolerate the time it takes to become better at something we value. This, in part, could be explained by the situations we are in at work; where a deadline might be pressing against the time it’s taking for us to master something. Yet, the problem can still lie with our own expectations. And, yes we might be expecting too much, and too soon. There are risks if we don’t come to terms with all of this — we could face burnout or even, sadness.

My dilemma, while writing this, is not only that we need to offer room for our skill sets to flourish — yet we must also manage when we bring them to the table. If we declare ourselves as competent too soon, we risk outcomes that could have been avoided if we had just given things more time. If we had just lowered our expectations about progress just a bit — if we chose our goals more prudently — maybe learning something can seem more natural once again.

Just my thoughts on the topic.

Share your experiences.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychology Practitioner who focuses on bringing core stability to our work lives. She is a charter member of the LinkedIn Top Voice Program. Her thoughts on work & life have appeared in various outlets including the Harvard Business Review, The World Economic Forum & the BBC.