Author: Marla Gottschalk

I'm Marla Gottschalk — an I/O Psychologist and workplace blogger.
Organizational Culture

Blamestorming & Other Telling Signs Your Organization is “Siloed”

by Marla Gottschalk12 Comments on Blamestorming & Other Telling Signs Your Organization is “Siloed”
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Photo by Jim Witkowski on Unsplash

I speak with organizations who have every intention of being collaborative. However, their collective actions tell a very different story. They envision functioning as a seamless, multi-functional entity — working in concert to satisfy clients and achieve organizational goals. But in reality, this is quite difficult to accomplish.

Unfortunately there are obvious, telling signs that they have missed the mark.

By and large, silos develop within organizations to protect valued resources. This is often fear-based — and building these proverbial “walls” can become the kiss of death for any organization that intends to remain agile. We’d all like to think of our organizations is immune to this condition. However, it is easy to slip into “protective mode”.

In some cases, we’ve acquiesced into a “silo-ed” state without recognizing the malaise.

Here are a few signs:

  • Lack of a consistent & constructive cross-functional conversation. Let’s be brutally honest — there really isn’t a lot of communication going on cross-functionally. Your customer/client process doesn’t really dovetail with other functional groups and sadly, no one seems to be alarmed that this integral step is absent.
  • Customers are no longer central to the conversation. Your teams are so busy putting out fires and keeping up with demands, that your clients are no longer central. When the “tail” (the acute issues) starts wagging the dog (being longer-term smart), it’s time to slow down and take another look.
  • You are unsure what other functions are really doing. Processes and procedures can evolve quickly. You can lose site of the roles that others play in the larger scheme. As result, your team really doesn’t have a grasp on how to effectively interface with other parts of the business.
  • Rampant “blame-storming”. Joint ownership of processes and procedures is non-existent. If issues seem to be more like “hot potatoes of blame” than a “call to arms” to improve — take this an ominous warning. If everyone seems to point a finger, yet no one is venturing to say “we take responsibility”, you may have a real problem.
  • Separate cultural identities. If each functional group is more akin to an independent “pop up” shop, take note. You might blame each other for the current problems or snafu, but it’s really the lack of shared vision that’s the offender. Time to re-group and get on the same page.
  • Things are portrayed as a “zero sum” game. If your group seems to feel that if they “give up” responsibility of tasks (even if tasks are best moved to another team), your organizational presence would be minimized. Scope of work should be assigned to the group best able to deliver the end-product of the highest quality.
  • You’ve given up trying to become a better organization. Many siloed organizations aren’t happy with the status quo — yet their employees feel that effort to change the dynamic would be fruitless. If you are so frustrated that you feel things cannot be improved, this is a telling sign that your group needs help.

Have you seen this operating in your organization? What did you do?

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist who starts conversations about work life core stability. She also writes as an Influencer at LinkedIn.

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10 Communication Hacks to Boost Your Effectiveness

by Marla Gottschalk3 Comments on 10 Communication Hacks to Boost Your Effectiveness
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Photo by Oleg Laptev on Unsplash

We all want to be heard. But do you have the skills to ensure that you are making an impact? Here’s a plan — learn how to communicate. Really communicate. Master the art of expressing an idea fully. Know your audience and how to receive the critical messages sent your way.

Here are 10 strategies to put you on the right road:

  • Curate. Yep, less is more. You are your own brand — and this extends to the content that you share with others. In our communication rich world, we are essentially vying for the attention of others. Are you worth their time? We communicate frequently, but with little forethought concerning purpose and outcome. Have a plan. Edit what you bring to the table.
  • Learn to handle difficult conversations. Let’s face it, the topic we’d most like to avoid, often has the potential to make the greatest impact. Research shows that we spend a significant amount of time handling conflict in our work lives (debate, disagreements, handling egos). So, learn how to openly address underlying tension before it affects your productivity.
  • Tell a great story. Great stories not only capture our attention — they help a message endure. The best thing? There are great tools to help you develop and explain the power behind your next great idea.
  • Get real. How are your communication skills playing out in real life? There is only one way to find out — see a video of yourself. Start with a short interview on Skype and work your way up to capturing an entire presentation. (There may be”cringe-worthy” moments. However, you cannot fix what you are not aware of.)
  • Study. Communication skills simply do not emerge spontaneously — as this is a skill set that requires focused practice to develop. Firstly, what are your “communication” strengths and weaknesses? Devote needed time and energy, by securing the training you need. By the way, you don’t have to wait for your organization to offer — check out some great ideas at Udemy. (I’d say it’s worth $49.00).
  • Create a “Vine”. A message is a message. A message that’s communicated powerfully and succinctly, can start a movement. Don’t rule out the newest methods to communicate. It’s always wise to fully stock your arsenal of techniques.
  • Study your own body. Sit in a lot of meetings? (I know that I do). What does your body language communicate? Boredom? Check yourself before you wreck yourself. Body language matters.
  • Create a powerful presentation deck. Want your next big idea implemented? There isn’t a more critical moment, than a start-up team in front of venture capitalists — so take a page out of their playbook. Can you communicate the strength of your next big project in 10 slides or less? I dare you to try.
  • Match it. Take the time to match the message with the communication vehicle. Will an e-mail suffice? Will your chosen method actually deliver your message effectively? The options should be weighed with the message in mind.
  • Meet face-to-face. The “mother lode” of communication tools is to meet in person, if at all possible. It’s the simplest and most brilliant “hack” of all — and of course, don’t forget to really listen.

Have another suggestion? Share it here.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist. She also writes at LinkedIn. You can also find her on Twitter.

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The Poor Fit: 6 Signs That Your Job is Absolutely the Wrong One

by Marla Gottschalk82 Comments on The Poor Fit: 6 Signs That Your Job is Absolutely the Wrong One
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@jakeezaccor

Please note: We are all aware of the personal/financial ramifications when we consider a job change. Take this post in the spirit in which it was written: to be helpful.

Many of us have experienced the wrong job. I would say that fault is difficult to assign. However, it may be dawning on you that your work life is dangerously out of alignment. Nothing is worse than throwing yourself into work with the best of intentions —  yet things seem to continue to go very, very wrong.

The trick to this situation? Identifying the problem for what it is (in very short shrift) and acting to make meaningful changes. Poor matches do happen. Recruitment is not always loaded in favor of applicants — and selection is not a perfect science.

So, take a deep breath. Let yourself off the hook and do what you can to avoid a long-term soul sucking experience.

Remember that “withering on the vine” is not a viable career strategy.

Here are 6 signs that you should be paying attention to:

  • You feel lost. Have you been experiencing the classic nightmare that you arrive at class, only to find that you’ve not read a single page of the textbook and it is final exam day? This should not be your experience with work during waking hours. If every task or project leaves you feeling unprepared, take note: fit errors do occur. Sometimes that “next step” in your career, has been the wrong step. It’s more than ok to acknowledge this.
  • You are in avoidance mode. Be honest with yourself — the process of going to work is absolutely excruciating. If you had your druthers, you would never set foot in the office again. If you’ve tried to make things work and you still can’t envision a future for yourself in your current role, you have a serious problem.
  • Your strengths aren’t being utilized. Ultimately our work should align with our strengths. If this is not the case, it’s time to start exploring other options. If you feel that your weaknesses have taken center stage, it’s unlikely you’ll stay energized for the long haul. Have a conversation with your supervisor now — and don’t wait.
  • You feel disconnected. Does it feel as if everyone else is on one page and you are on another? Whether you work in customer service, sales or consulting — if it feels as if you are not aligning with the vision of the organization, the person-job match may be off. If you see yourself as a lonely island (and everyone is speaking an entirely different “language”), it may be time to explore moving on.
  • You can’t seem to complete anything. Everything seems pointless and your level of motivation is at an all-time low. Are your psychological resources waning? Are you dealing with looming deadlines with a blank screen continually staring back at you? Have you simply stopped caring? All are telling signs.
  • You are entering self-blame mode. You certainly can own the part of the problem that you’ve controlled (you’ve ignored your “inner voice”, for example). However, I guarantee there were plenty of other factors in play. The bottom line is this: You are not happy and it’s time to act. Blame doesn’t help things resolve — only a plan to move forward will.

Of course — please pay attention to physical signs of stress. If you are not sleeping or eating take heed. Feeling depressed or anxious is a clear indicator that something is off. Time to take the issue to your supervisor, a trusted mentor or a health professional.

Has this ever been your experience? How did you move forward? Share the story with our community.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist. She examines the effect of Core Stability on work & work life life. A charter member of the LinkedIn Influencer Program since 2012 — her thoughts on work life have appeared in various outlets including Talent Zoo, Forbes, Quartz and The Huffington Post.

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Learning to Say “No”

by Marla Gottschalk4 Comments on Learning to Say “No”

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We’ve all made our share of solid career moves. But, as far as time management goes — many if us freely admit our struggles. Last year I published The Ugly Truth About Time Management, partially based on my own flawed relationship with time. (Interestingly, it has been a very well read here at The Office Blend). We all grapple with decisions concerning time. Ultimately, time — and our relationship with it — is critical.

I thought we could probe the topic a little further. Possibly scratch a bit further beneath the surface. (Examine the underbelly of time management and see what is lurking there). Which leads me to an important time management issue: Learning to say “no”.

I find this difficult at times, as most of us do — even though I’ve had years of practice. Many of us feel a deep sense of anxiety with the prospect of saying “no”, for various reasons. But, saying “no” is quite vital to our long-term success. If we don’t treat our own time as a precious resource, we can find ourselves without adequate “bandwidth” when we need it most. This sets the stage for a myriad of work life problems.

We’d all like to think that “all in” when it comes to helping others — and developing healthy workplace relationships should be a priority. However you’ll find the need to draw the line in some situations. Setting boundaries is simply required, setting the stage for healthy “Give and take”.

The truth is, learning to say “no” does become easier with practice. (You can rehearse a set of diplomatic responses, so they become second nature.) The trick is recognizing the situations that clearly deserve that response. So, let’s start the “No” motor going, and discuss the biases we bring to the table and the types of individuals we might come across.

You’ll likely recognize some of these:

The Preconceptions:

  • The “Angel” Trap. I get it, you want to be nice. Nice people are…well nice. People who say no, not so nice. The flaw here? It’s just not true. Savvy business people say no quite a bit, and many of them are great people. Why? They want to stay in business. You are the only one who suffers, if you don’t make it clear that your time is valuable. You have to get over this.
  • Every “yes” is equal. Nope. Not even close. You have to really consider what the “yes” implies. Is your “yes” a quick “here you go” or more likened to a life-long commitment. Think on this.
  • The “I’m missing out” Trap. It can be in our best interest to say “yes” to opportunities — however, you’ll need to weight the time investment against the potential outcomes. If you never say no, you’ll likely become over-committed in a hurry. That is a serious problem.
  • The “Bad things will happen if” trap. Many of us live in fear that if we say “no” our careers will suffer. The wrong person might be angered,and this may lead to dire consequences. But, in some cases we can say “no”, we just have not explored the option. Obviously, consider who is doing the asking, but don’t say “yes”, instinctively. If you do comply to a request from a superior, that you really cannot deliver — a whole new set of problems can arise.

The “Time Offenders”:

  • The Greedy. You know this individual. They only contact you when they want a favor, and the relationship is not even close to being considered reciprocal. Enough said. This one should be easy. Run the other way.
  • The Narcissists. Wow, they are “so, so busy” — so could you complete this entirely worthless task for them? Ok, offer a little rope. Offer your help as long as you feel comfortable, then see if the favor can be returned in some small way. If they don’t ever give back, you’ll feel justified to saying “no” the next time around.
  • The Pilferers. They’ll steal you blind time-wise, if you let them. They’d like to “pick your brain” and hear your best thoughts on a topic or challenge. The problem is this: as soon as they accomplish this they are gone. It’s shocking. Be mindful. These individuals are both smooth and savvy.
  • The Thankless. The group comprises the absolute worst of the worst. They will ask for your valuable time (which you freely give), and never, ever says “thanks”. It hurts doesn’t it? Remember this the next time around.

When all is said and done, if you would like to help someone and are offered a sincere “Thank you” — don’t say “You’re welcome” in response. Take the advice offered here and respond with the following,

“I know you would do the same for me.”

Anything to add to the conversation? Share your thoughts.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist. She also writes at LinkedIn.

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Let’s Banish Bad Bosses

by Marla Gottschalk6 Comments on Let’s Banish Bad Bosses
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Photo by Paul Hanaoka on Unsplash

I’d like to pose a challenge.

Let’s reconsider promoting an individual to the position of managing others, if we even remotely suspect that they are not up to the task. On another level — please think twice about accepting the responsibility of becoming a manager if you feel at all unprepared.

Unfortunately, there seems to be an ancient and unwritten workplace law operating — telling us that when we reach a certain level of tenure or performance, we are automatically bestowed the responsibility of managing others. This may be exactly where the original problem lies; a complete lack of awareness concerning what is involved to manage others effectively. We need to consider these junctures more carefully, as we have more than our share of problems with managers already.

Let me talk you out of your decision, delay it, at least until you or the employee are adequately prepared for the challenge. A solid technical expert does not “a manager make” — and truthfully, there are only a handful of people who should be given the privilege of becoming a “boss”. Most of us require appropriate training or the benefit of a mentor to build this skill set.

It’s difficult to move forward without addressing this critical issue. Providing great bosses for our employees, is a formative step in building healthier, happier organizations. It is likely the single most important factor impacting employee engagement. However, its impact upon organizational performance may not be universally recognized. The true power of “excellence in managing others” is not be fully embraced. There are certainly great bosses in the workplace and we need to collectively learn more from them. Who are they? What are they doing?

There is no time like the present to attack this problem. Developing better managers may actually be less complicated than we might expect — but we have to make that all important commitment to explore this fully. We should consider addressing the managerial basics first: Showing concern for employees, building resiliency, serving as a “motivator” (money only takes us so far), providing direction and developing others.

But, above all, do no harm.

I am alarmed to learn what employees are facing with their own managers. The collected expressions of frustration and bewilderment, cause me to pause and consider a number of the raised questions concerning managers:

  • What are best practices for recognizing, developing and encouraging effective managers? (I propose a Department of Managerial Excellence.)
  • Who is ultimately responsible for a poor manager?
  • What recourse do employees have if their manager is ineffective?
  • What is the organization’s role to monitor and intervene, in response to poor management?
  • Are poor managers offered feedback concerning their lack of skills, as managers, so they might improve?

Have we been missing the boat, in terms of weaving the shared value of “management excellence” into the workplace? Have the economic times caused us to become forgetful of its importance? If so, what can we do to reverse the trend?

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist. She also writes at LinkedIn.

Career, Happiness at work

Getting Out of Our Own Way: Employing a Life Strategy

by Marla Gottschalk1 Comment on Getting Out of Our Own Way: Employing a Life Strategy

raj-eiamworakul-1031067-unsplashAt times, we’ve all lost our way  — and finding our way back to the right path is imperative. This process can prove both confusing and painful. Often, we believe that the root problem lies externally; the wrong boss, team or organization. But, are we overlooking the obvious? In fact, looking inward might just be the best place to begin. Truth be told, we put enough obstacles in our own career paths to last more than a lifetime. When it comes down to it — we are usually right there in the mix, adding to the fog.

What if you could find that vital guidance, that mantra of direction, to actually get out of your own way once and for all? Well, developing a life strategy may be the needed prescription. It’s not fluff — it’s just plain smart.

We assume we’ll traverse through our careers (and our lives for that matter) without taking a single moment of pause to formulate a plan. (An organization wouldn’t think of moving forward without first considering a clear-cut path.) Strategy, can allow us to focus on our goals. Because at the inflection points that challenge us, we often forget to stop, breathe and look in all directions.

A great read to find that needed path is Allison Rimm’s, The Joy Of Strategy. (Her concept of the “Joy Meter” is a stunner, and that alone is worth the read. Apply the meter to your work life — and you will never view work or career, in quite the same way.)

A few things The Joy of Strategy would also like us to consider:

  • Listening more. Not to everyone else — to yourself. Stop shopping for the advice that would allow you to support what you already know you need from your work life. Trust that inner voice. What have you left behind? As Rimm describes so aptly, “Don’t die with your song still inside of you.”
  • Taking another look at purpose. We can easily confuse being busy with purpose — and defining a “clear intention” can help to filter out the “noise” surrounding our most important career decisions. When I began blogging two years ago, a colleague was less than enthused with my career pivot. This caused me real stress. But, when all was said and done — the path fulfilled my purpose to help others gain fulfillment in the workplace.
  • Visualize, visualize, visualize. Where do you really want to be? What would you be doing? What do you really want to accomplish? One solid strategy for change, is to thoroughly consider the “future state”. Go there — dream a little — it will help you master your future.
  • Defining what you really need. Be brutally honest. If you could move forward to build your best career life, what materials would you collect to ensure your success? A trusted mentor? More opportunities to lead a team? Sharper communication skills? Take the time to define these.
  • Time and Emotion.  We spend our time — but what do those moments really offer us? As Rimm explains, “We should all derive some measure of joy from our work.” I couldn’t agree more. That indeed, is a winning strategy.

How have you built your own life strategy? Tell us a little about that here.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist. She also writes at LinkedIn.

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15 Quotes to Get Your Head in the Right Place at Work

by Marla Gottschalk17 Comments on 15 Quotes to Get Your Head in the Right Place at Work

Photo by Maksim Goncharenok on Pexels.com

Not every day of work can begin with unbridled enthusiasm.

We all have those moments when our emotional status is just not aligning with a productive day. Personally, I’m never entirely sure about the root cause of my own malaise. It could be anything I suppose — a stressful interaction that has lingered, a bad dream or even the cheesecake I had last night for dessert.

However, it can spell trouble for the day.

Changing the dynamic, becomes the first order of business. Sometimes, I opt to read New Yorker cartoons.  Sometimes, I call a trusted colleague or friend. If all else fails, I read quotes about work life, career and inspiration.

Here are some of my favorite “mood changing” quotes.

I hope of of them offers you what you might need to impact your day for the better.


  1. Choose a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life. – Confucius


  2. It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it. – Lou Holtz


  3. Do your work with your whole heart and you will succeed – there is so little competition. – Elbert Hubbard


  4. All things are difficult before they are easy. – Thomas Fuller


  5. The harder I work, the luckier I get – Samuel Goldwyn


  6. Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don’t recognize them. – Ann Landers


  7. The secret of getting ahead, is getting started. – Mark Twain


  8. It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in ourselves. – William Shakespeare


  9. When we no longer can change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. – Viktor E. Frankl


  10. There are two kinds of people, those who do the work and those who take the credit. Try to be in the first group; there is less competition there. – Indira Gandhi


  11. Study the past, if you would divine the future. – Confucius


  12. A career is wonderful, but you can’t curl up with it on a cold night. – Marilyn Monroe


  13. Food, love, career and mothers, the four major guilt groups. – Cathy Guisewite


  14. Believe you can and you are halfway there. – Theodore Roosevelt


  15. Change your thoughts and you change your world. – Norman Vincent Peale

Share your favorites in the comments section. I am sure I have missed more than a few classics.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist who focuses on empowering work through the development of a strong foundation. She is a charter member of the LinkedIn Top Voice Program. Her thoughts on work life have appeared in various outlets including the Harvard Business Review, Talent Zoo, Forbes, Quartz and The Huffington Post.

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A Little Laughter Doesn’t Hurt: The Most Read Posts of 2013

by Marla GottschalkLeave a Comment on A Little Laughter Doesn’t Hurt: The Most Read Posts of 2013

happy-new-year

The close of another year always brings a moment of reflection. So many things come to mind — the challenge of workplace engagement, the need for truly inspiring managers, how loving our work drives us forward. This year there was a good deal of attention focused upon accepting ourselves for who we really are, and learning to transact those strengths into fulfillment at work. I feel hopeful that we have reached an inflection point — where individual differences will be embraced and valued. When we have the opportunity to share the best of ourselves at work, great things can happen. Engagement can soar and we feel a much needed sense of connection.

Transparency continued to be a guiding theme. Whether we were considering how we manage our time or developing our own personal brand, honesty seems to be the policy of choice. As such, we should feel free to not only embrace who we really are —  but our mistakes, as well.  On a final note, humor is still, and should always remain a priority —  as #5  illustrates. It seems that the option for a good laugh, is still a very handy workplace tool.

Below are the 5 posts that received the most activity (views + shares) at The Office Blend during 2013.  I’ve also included a second “Top 5” list — my favorite posts from around the web.

I’d like to thank all of you for supporting The Office Blend, with your time (and shares) in 2013. Happy New Year to you and yours!

Top 5 posts:

  1. How Not to Manage an Introvert
  2. Brand Yourself as a High Potential
  3. The Ugly Truth About Time Management
  4. Why We Should Still Practice the “70-20-10” Rule
  5. 5 of the Funniest Workplace Commercials of All Time

Some remarkable posts from around the web:

  1. Three Tips for Overcoming Your Blind Spots, John Dame and Jeffrey Gedmin, HBR.
  2. What Losing My Job Taught Me About Leading, Douglas Conant, HBR
  3. Google’s Quest to Build a Better Boss, Adam Bryant, The New York Times
  4. How to Sell Ideas Like Gladwell, Jonah Berger, LinkedIn.
  5. Always, Always, Always Show Up, Whitney Johnson, HBR.

What are you striving for at work in 2014? Share your hopes and goals.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist and coach.  Read more of her posts at LinkedIn.

Career, Happiness at work

More Options for Today’s Working Women: Leaning “Homeward” vs Leaning “In”

by Marla Gottschalk8 Comments on More Options for Today’s Working Women: Leaning “Homeward” vs Leaning “In”

Work life balance

Many women would opt for time away from the traditional “9 to 5” work life to remain home with children — and a growing body of research supports this.  I reached this inflection point a short time after finishing my degree. Happily entrenched in a growing HR consulting firm (with a fair amount of career momentum on my side), it became obvious that my best laid plans for melding home and work life weren’t going to materialize. At the time, my decision to “lean out” may have appeared ill-advised — but as time would pass, it became clear that it was truly for the best.

Our young son didn’t sleep nights. He couldn’t tolerate formula. He seemed particularly distressed when we left him with a sitter for even a few hours. When I compared stories with other working mothers, things just weren’t adding up to a “lean in” scenario. The guilt and compounding stress were overpowering. I was torn between two disparate worlds that just weren’t meshing. My instincts told me to stay at home if at all possible. Luckily, after weighing both emotional and financial concerns, the option to complete some project work at home came into play. I happily chose this option — too exhausted in the moment to even begin to evaluate the long-term ramifications of that decision.

Knowing what I know today about work life integration, I would have sought a more permanent part-time solution (with an option to return when home life became more predictable). A recent article in The Atlantic, Moms Who Cut Back at Work Are Happier, explores the often difficult quest for women to find balance with their ever-evolving roles. The piece discusses research which reveals that many married moms would indeed, rather work part-time at specific points or “seasons” in their career — “leaning homeward” instead of “leaning in”. Furthermore, many who have the opportunity to embark on such a career “sacrifice” are happier overall. A recent CBS/New York Times survey echoes this sentiment, where it was found that nearly one-half of working women with children under the age of 18, would prefer an option to work part-time.

The fact remains, that it is challenging for many women to carry on their careers after children, as if nothing has changed. Dialing down the pressure should be a viable option — but keeping meaningful work in plain sight should also be part of that equation. With women making a significant investment in both their education and career, this has become a growing necessity — as we should have the opportunity to continue to contribute in a manner that remains fulfilling.

We are indeed making progress in this area. However, widespread acceptance of part-time options will likely not materialize until we acknowledge the need for a pervasive change in mindset. If you have had the opportunity to read, Why Women Still Can’t Have It All, by Anne-Marie Slaughter — you’d know exactly where I am going with this. We have to step up and vocalize what we really need to remain both happy and productive. With a healthy dose of transparency, these changes may come sooner than later. We  should discuss the realities of melding work and career life, openly and often — because the essence of being truly happy at work, might lie just as much in being honest about what we cannot do — as much as what we can.

Suffice it to say, that my instinct to remain at home was on target. I needed to be there for a variety of reasons. Years later, it is apparent that I’ve had a fair amount of explaining to do in reference to the gap in my career. However of late, I no longer feel the need to either hide the reason — or the fact that I did so without hesitation.

I would like to think that in the future — working women won’t have to make these decisions bleary-eyed and exhausted.

Have you shared a similar experience? Were you able to adjust and work part-time? Share your story.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist.  Read more of her posts at LinkedIn.

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Considering a Change in Direction? How to Deal with Non-Believers

by Marla Gottschalk2 Comments on Considering a Change in Direction? How to Deal with Non-Believers

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Career growth can be both an exhausting and exhilarating experience.

You have already dealt with the internal struggle — realizing that a change was necessary. Then, there is both the commitment and possible sacrifice necessary to ensure that real change occurs. (You may be juggling coursework or tackling a stretch assignment in addition to your assigned tasks).

We expect that the process will be challenging.

However, it can be disconcerting that the most surprising aspect of ordeal, are those around us who just cannot seem to get on-board. Already well outside your comfort zone — it can be difficult to squelch all of the “nay-saying” from those around you. Those that just cannot seem to let you evolve.

How do you handle individuals who are less than supportive? The off-handed remarks and the reminders of the obstacles that may come. Remember that you can’t change others or how they see your path. However, you can filter their remarks.
Consider these points:

  • Some people will not see what you see. Goals are very personal. Explaining why you seem to be flinging yourself toward shaky ground, can seem frightening to some. Remember that you are the only that truly understands why you need to embark on this journey.
  • Jealousy does exist. Career bravery on your part — can sometimes elicit a note of career envy from others. Watching others make progress can be hard to digest for some.
  • Ubiquitous disengagement. There are many people who are unhappy with their own role, yet do not recognize where they are. Do not allow their malaise to affect your resolve.
  • Some people are mean. Shocking, but true. There are individuals who just do will not play nice. They will revel in pointing out the obvious (that change is hard) and will never offer credit, when it is due.

What to do next:

  • Consider the feedback. Try to take the stance that all feedback is useful. Listen to all that is said, but process the information carefully.
  • Tell them what you need. Just as Don Draper expressed in Mad Men, if the conversation is headed in the wrong direction — “change the conversation”. When skepticism and doubt are all that is presented, remind them that the journey is challenging and solicit their support.
  • Plan your re-brand “roll out”. Any career shift certainly requires a re-branding “roll out”. Plan to inform others about your new direction and how it might affect your work. Try developing an “elevator pitch” that nicely explains where you are headed.
  • Let it go. In some cases, you need to simply ignore the negativity and move on. There are those who hold a “fixed mindset” and do not believe that people can evolve successfully. Prove them wrong, then lend support to others who also aspire to evolve.

Have you ever met resistance when you were venturing onto a new career path? What strategies worked for you?

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist. Read more of her posts at LinkedIn.